Joey is snoring, has been for an hour, but JC is frozen with his eyes wide open. He’s tired enough, but can’t bring himself to close his eyes. He doesn't know what's brought it on, never does, but whatever it is he hates it. Times like this he wishes his brain came with an off switch. Most of the time he loves that he's always got something new to think about, a head full of ideas. But sometimes when the night goes quiet it forgets to fall asleep, and whispers about things JC is too afraid to think about during the daytime.

Joey shifts in his sleep, rolling away from JC and sighing a little. For a moment JC panics, contemplating reaching over and pulling Joey back over. Instead, he listens to Joey breathe, anxious for every rise and fall of his chest. It’s the only sound in the room and JC clings to it, terrified that it might stop, or that one day he'll lie down to sleep and it won't be there at all. He feels suddenly cold now that there is nothing but air in the place Joey was just a moment ago, and he places a hand in the indentation Joey's back made in the mattress, feeling the fading warmth under his fingers. The blinds aren't closed all the way, and a little bit of moonlight splashes over Joey's shoulders. JC can see the outline of Joey's head nestled against the pillow. He pictures what the bed would look like without Joey in it, and shivers. Life without Joey was too painful to think about, but late at night when he wasn't asleep, JC thought about it.

He knows in the morning he'll be red eyed and bleary looking, a pathetic contrast to a bright-eyed, well-rested Joey. Joey will look at him and ask him what's wrong, and JC will say nothing, because nothing is. Things are good. They'll lie on the couch and watch movies; JC will place his head on Joey's chest, right where he can hear Joey's heart beat. Joey will play with JC's hair, and JC will wonder why he lost all that sleep the night before.

But even knowing this, JC’s not sleeping, and in the back of his mind he wonders if Joey ever looses sleep over him. Part of him would like to think so, but in the end he decides it doesn't really matter.

In the darkness JC snuggles up to Joey’s back and puts an arm around him, just to reassure himself that Joey is there and isn't going anywhere, at least for tonight.

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