Sunrise From Indigo
Shame On Me: Lance
By Mariah

The phone rings and I hear you answer, your smile shining through in your voice. I love the way you handle people. You are so loving and gentle with everyone. Everyday, I realize how lucky I am to be loved by you. You wear your heart on your shoulder and I admire that.

Your smile affects me so much. Your tears are just as moving. When you walk into the kitchen, your tears steal my breath away. I hug you without thinking. It's automatic.

"Joey?"

I want to be strong for you but it's so hard. As sobs shake your body, hot tears stream down my face into your hair.

I don't want to ask, but I have to know. "Joey, what's wrong? What happened?" I ask softly. I need to know why you're hurting so I can fix it.

"My Dad-"

When your voice cracks, my heart drops.

"Is he okay, Joey?"

Your hair brushes my cheek when you nod and I catch the scent of your hair gel. I love you so much.

"He…he had…had a heart attack." Your sobs tell me that your heart is broken. "He's in the hospital."

You've been through so much in your life. It really isn't fair. You've finally recovered from what was almost the end of your life and now you have to face this. It isn't fair at all.

When you look up at me, there is desperation in your eyes. You look so scared and anxious. You look trapped. I'm afraid you are going to bolt if I let go.

"I need to go. I have to be with him. I have to go, Lance."

I hold you tighter as you pull away. I don't want to let go. I don't want you to run away. This is scary. I need you here with me.

But this isn't about me.

This is about you and I love you.

"Let me get the car keys." It's the obvious answer. You aren't running away from me. You aren't leaving me. You are screaming for me. You need me by your side. Your eyes tell the truth.

Alone we are weak at these moments. Together we are strong.

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